Couples Retreat

I’ve heard a lot of mixed feelings about “Couples Retreat.” Either people loved it and thought it was hilarious or they just hated it. I’d have to say that yea, there were entertaining moments, but the film itself was pretty forgettable. I am, once again, just unimpressed and can’t say that the movie was awful but it really wasn’t good either. Frankly, it was just mediocre.

“Couples Retreat” is about four couples who go on a therapy retreat disguised as a mini-vacation. Dave and Ronnie, played by Vince Vaughn and Malin Akerman, are a cute married couple with two kids and the average go-go-go lifestyle. OCD perfectionist Jason, played by Jason Bateman, is married to Cynthia, played by Kirsten Bell. Jason and Cynthia thrive on control and order and when they fail in conceiving a child after multiple attempts, their relationship is strained, leaving Cynthia fed up and Jason seeking abstract ways to control the situation. Joey, played by John Favreau, and Lucy, played by Kristen Davis, are spitefully unfaithful high school sweethearts who got pregnant just before graduating high school. They both look at their marriage as a union that only lasts so long as their obligation holds them – a.k.a when their daughter graduates and moves out, they’re splitting up. Lastly, Shane, played by Faizon Love, has recently got a divorce from his wife Jennifer after she walked out on him. In his grief, he begins dating a twenty-year-old teeny-bopper Trudy, played by Kali Hawk, who is sucking Shane’s already-limited finances dry while pushing him to the max on the twenty-something scene of booze and partying. At this island, the couples are confronted with a maniacal relationship master, shark encounters, and a Fabio-like yoga instructor in skimpy speedos which either strengthens their relationships or drives them further apart.

Obviously each of the couples has their quirks and dysfunctional tendencies which makes the film entertaining but infuriating at the same time. There are a few of the people in these relationships where the individualistic, modern feminist in me screams, “Why are you still putting up with him?!” Don’t get me wrong, some of the girls were irritating too, not just the guys – but there is a point where enough is enough and it seems like when a relationship is obviously over and all that is keeping it together is a small strand of a relational title, then it is time to throw in the towel and move on to the next chapter in your life. I think that a lot of times comedies have Shakespearitis in the fact that they feel like they need to tie up all the loose ends – no matter how absurd or unrealistic – with a nice big ribbon on it.

You know what I don’t understand? Vince Vaughn. He doesn’t seem to be a very progressive actor at all. He seems to play the exact same character in every role he’s in. Isn’t the point of acting to prove that you are talented enough to take on versatile roles spanning all genres? If that isn’t the point of acting, then why would talented actors like Heath Ledger, Jake Gyllenhaal and Robin Williams choose homosexual roles when that isn’t their sexual preference? From my perspective, it seems that seasoned actors enter a genre, conquer it and move on to a more challenging one, resulting in a well-rounded portfolio at the end of their career. What does Vince Vaughn have to show for his acting diversity? He doesn’t! He is always the witty goofball who always has a snide comeback in his arsenal which seems like his personality in real life. If that’s the case, all he has to do is be himself in different on-set situations. Should we then – those of you who like Vince Vaughn – be glorifying a man who doesn’t even put an effort into his job? I know I’d like to see him step up to the plate and take on a role that he hasn’t done before; it’d be epic. On another interesting note, I think it’s funny that all four women are absolutely gorgeous and they’re married to men who, well, aren’t so gorgeous. That just doesn’t seem fair. Couldn’t we girls get a little eye candy too?

In our world of crisis, where jobs are hard to come by, the economy is slipping and divorce rates are sky high, there is one profession that is blooming – Psychologists. Being a therapist seems to be a very lucrative profession nowadays considering so many people go to couples therapy in order to sit down, talk out your problems and then be analyzed and diagnosed in how their relationship should be fixed – or worse how you should be fixed. I think it’s funny that we in our society put the fate of our relationships in the hands of an objective observer so that we may get their professional opinion on how bad or good we’re doing in our lives. This is somewhat of a parody in “Couples Retreat” where all of the therapists ask the bromidic question, “And how does that make you feel?” Some of the psychologists conducting the sessions for the couples seemed ludicrous in their diagnoses and shed more doubt than they did encouragement.

Probably the best part of this movie is Malin Akerman and Vince Vaughn’s little boy who steals the show with his cute little comments and his naively adorable mistakes. Though this little cutie doesn’t have a lot of screen time, I think he is the funniest attribute to this movie when he spends the majority of his time in home appliance stores practicing his potty training skills. Moral: Try to help your kids differentiate between a bathroom toilet and an on-display toilet; otherwise store clerks will hate you forever. In sum, “Couples Retreat” had a few good parts, a few bad parts and a few ugly parts, but all in all, the film was just stream-line. It is forgettable and has no real thought-provoking morals or lessons which anyone can take away and put to use in their own lives. If you’re a Vince Vaughn fan, you’ll probably like this one because he doesn’t change one bit – which is probably why you like him. But really, “Couples Retreat” fails to impress.